Handshakes, punter-to-offensive lineman touchdowns, re-writing history before it happens and a little thing called the playoff comeback: It was a wild week in the conference championship games, and now we know who’s heading to Super Bowl XLIX. Spoiler Alert: It’s Katy Perry.
Fat Guy Touchdown! (insert sound of Reggaeton horn) Down 16 and unable to get anything going, the Seahawks lined up in the third quarter for a field goal—and their first points of the day. But Pete Carroll called for the fake, and punter Jon Ryan passed to rookie offensive lineman Clint Gresham for a much more impression first score. It was a beauty of a weird play and gave us this up close look of fear in the eyes of a punter throwing a touchdown.
Blount smoked the Colts defense for three touchdowns in the lesser-half of Sunday’s double header. 30 carries for 148 yards forced the Colts defense to bite on the run, opening up the play-action pass for the Golden Boy. Tom Brady went 23 for 35 attempts and hit four receivers for passes over 15 yards. Look for the Pats to keep this pattern in an attempt to run down the Seahawks defense.
Beast Mode was full of Skittles on Sunday; his 25 carries for 157 yards helped keep the Seahawks from completely capsizing during the first 44-minutes against the Packers. His 24 yard touchdown run was the go-ahead score for the Seahawks after they recovered an onside kick. His celebration was all business as he grabbed his crotch and then politely shook hands with his teammates.
Russell Wilson’s first half
DangerRUSS was abysmal in the first half of the NFC Championship Game. He had three interceptions and only 20 yards passing, while failing to lead the Seahawks on a scoring drive for nearly three quarters. He tried to hit up Jermaine Kearse four times during regulation and all four of them resulted in interceptions. His first-half performance was so bad, we’ve compiled a list of Wilson’s that could have done a better job of Russell:
– Wilson from “Home Improvement”
– Mr. Wilson from Dennis the Menace (all varieties, but especially Walter Matthau in the 1993 movie)
– Wilson the volleyball from “Cast Away”
– Former president Woodrow Wilson.
Civil War general Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck couldn’t find his favorite target T.Y. Hilton (six targets and only one catch) and couldn’t find much of anyone else, finishing with only 12 completions all day. He also threw two interceptions and failed to receive much help from a defense that gave up 45 points to the New England Golden Boys. He was also set up to fail by this ludacris tweet from his owner Jim “Money & Drugs in a Bag” Irsay:
The moment is begging for history's nudge…fingerprints on page 18 of January spilling today into the yesterday's memory of tomorrow…
— Jim Irsay (@JimIrsay) January 18, 2015
The conservative play-calling of the Packers coach probably seemed okay as the Pack had a 16-point lead, but deciding to kick five field goals—including two on 4th-and-one and one from the half-yard line—eventually caught up the Packers of Catan. And the late-game decision to run three straight times after a late Seattle interception failed to take enough time off the clock to prevent the Seahawks now-epic comeback. McCarthy and his staff could only watch as the Packers’ 16 point lead dwindled to a 28-22 overtime loss. Brandon Bostick might be the one apologizing, but he has his coach to thank for putting him into the position of team scapegoat.